THE WAY IT IS - Age Fifteen

I know that Mom really worried about me as a teenager, especially about the time I turned
15 when, without realizing it, I started to get really moody. Then, just like Dad, I started to
do weird things. Mom was at her wits end and both of us were really scared. I didn’t know
what was happening. It seemed like I was alone in the world; there was nobody to help me,
not even Mom. I didn’t know how to stop feeling and acting the way I was. It seemed like
some strange powerful force was inside my head making me behave badly and do wild,
violent things I really didn’t want to do.
Mom didn’t know what to do. I think she figured I was going through a phase and would
grow out of it. She might have thought about taking me to the hospital in the city, like Dad,
but she didn’t do it or even talk to me about it.
In the meantime my school work was going down the tubes. I just couldn’t pay attention to
what was going on, so lots of days I would just skip and stay home in my room with the
door shut, doing nothing. Then I dropped out of school altogether. I got a part-time job but
I couldn’t pay attention to the work I was supposed to do and after a few weeks they fired
me. I got another job but lost that one too. I got job after job but I always wound up getting
fired a little while later. After a few months of that I gave up trying to work. I just sat at
home all the time and watched TV. I hardly ever saw anybody except Mom when she got
home from work but we didn’t talk much. Neither of us knew what to say, what was the
matter with me or what to do.
Slowly life went on. After a long time my symptoms gradually diminished, I was able to
concentrate better and I went out and got a job that I was able to keep.